7g Protein | Simple Ingredients | 0g Sugar
Net carbs: 6-7g Added sugars: 0g
Overall rating: 😁😋⁉️
Flavor
These are a distinctly different flavor profile than I’m used to tasting here. This is the first product with cheese in it, after all.
Now, Dirtballs are vegan, but I’m not. I enjoy cheese and beef jerky regularly for my snacking. So I enjoy seeing new protein bars like these and Epic that incorporate meat or cheese.
Both flavors taste a lot like bagels and cream cheese on a foggy morning. Perhaps you could break these out on a brunch date or while you and your lover enjoy your coffee on the front porch.
The Everything Cheddar flavor has a bit more spunk to it. It tastes like they used a good sharp cheddar, and as far as I’m concerned sharp cheddar is the only cheese that really matters. Gruyere can come hang out too, and bleu cheese is allowed if it brought some decent red wine and candied almonds along with it.
If you’re already into bagels, artisan cheese, and a mouthfeel that’s crunchy without being too explosive, these would be a great addition to your snack repertoire.
Packaging appeal
Aesthetically, this is great packaging. It looks enough like other snack bars but also feels at home with pasta and organic crackers. It’s always good to give people a little window so they can see the food. As long as your food looks appealing (which these do.)
This is really loud plastic, too. I didn’t notice it until I was editing the video, but this is an exceptionally loud wrapper. So don’t bring these to the movie theater.
I know it’s probably a practical concern, but I don’t like the little plastic tray the crisps come in. Extra plastic is always bad, and it makes these feel like cheap airplane snacks. I wouldn’t be mad tho if they gave me a pack of these on my next flight though.
Hold up. Did they call this a crisp bar because they thought just calling them crisps wouldn’t be as appealing? No one gives a shit about crisps, but everyone loves bars.
I’m gonna stick with this theory. It sounds like advice that any decent F&B marketing consultants would give.
Ingredient quality
Ingredient-wise, this is one of the top 2 products I’ve reviewed. There are fewer than 8 ingredients, many of which are organic, and each ingredient is actually food!
I have a bias toward products made of real food. Maybe in the future our gut biomes will be better suited to digesting lab-produced soy leghemoglobin and other weird stuff people put in food products.
For now, though, I think people are better off eating real food. Not even that everything has to be organic or non-GMO. Just eat food you don’t need a million-dollar lab to produce.
Sonoma Creamery has the right idea. They definitely hired a good marketing firm to launch their various snack products.
Zero Sugar. Protein front and center. All the relevant snack-related buzzwords are here. No one has time to actually deal with real cheese, so let’s give these busy millennials something good to snack on between hot yoga and their next TaskRabbit gig.
Company practices
Overall this feels like a good company. It’s obviously a legacy dairy business that hired a snazzy marketing firm to spice up their image and help sell more cheese through snack product lines, though.
Dairy farmers don’t use phrases like “only ingredients you can pronounce” or “our innovative baked cheese snack line.” I’ve worked with marketing firms before, and these are exactly the type of lifeless platitudes they thrive on.
My intention is not to hate on SC, though. I like it when businesses adapt well to market trends. I’m also from Sonoma County, and it’s great to see people from back home thriving.
Overall, I was really feeling Sonoma Creamery until I saw this product line:
WTF, Sonoma Creamery???
This is such hacky soulless pandering to kids and moms. I’m glad kids will be eating these instead of Cheeze-its and Cheetos, but this whole product line just doesn’t feel right. The design of these bags isn’t as put-together as the crisp bars.
Kids do seem to enjoy funny shaped snacks like this though.
Snackability
These are highly snackable. They come in two-packs, which increases this score dramatically.
Also, savory snacks are more versatile than sweet ones (and probably healthier). These could be eaten alone, crumbled on a salad, or dipped in Toby’s Tofu Pate. All would be delicious snack experiences.
Overall, Sonoma Creamery Savory Crisp Bars get a rating of 😁😋⁉️
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